Soon time for work but i cant sleep, just think about all things around me.
This story of my life makes me wanna change everything.
Been trying to take the day as it comes, went for a long walk with bella and picked up my films and later a visit at the hospital. Then i took all the films and scanned them. I wonder if i will be able to continue taking pictures, right now it feels hard. It is all to complicated and I feel to much when I look in the camera, cant see/feel the moment anymore
I really love this picture. I feel so many things loking at it, maybe because it in a way tell me a story.
Got the last piece to my pinhole camera today, thanks to the Swefo guys.
Time to start assembling it now. So maybe I can take a day to use it in the weekend. Also guess i need to read some more about Focal length, shutters and so on to really succeed with this.
“The purpose of life is not to be hapy. It’s to be useful, to honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well”
A quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson, an American poet, lecturer and essayist that lived between 1803 – 1882. A man that was seen to have some quite radical religious views at the time. He was also seen as a champion of individualism and a prescient critic of the countervailing pressures of society.
When this Friday came I was happy, had begun to feel a calm. Also happy for being free for some days after some exhausting weeks. But it all changed so fast, the weekend went from calm to hell in such a short period. Now Monday is here again and I dont feel rested in any way at all. Luckily i worked Sunday night so I have today and tomorrow of, only work Wednesday to Friday and then im free again.
Tried to give my self a good day today, in a way to compensate what i did not get during the weekend. Did not really help, but atleast i tried.
Im still at same page and I have problems reading it out.
I write for me and my thoughts to come.
A broken heart is what I feel it leads to flowing tears, the sorrow from this loneliness gives way to deeper fears. I hurt inside from losing you I’m often asking why? How could this end so suddenly? I feel like I could die it wasn’t very long ago that you and I embraced it feels like only yesterday.
And now my soul’s displaced I’m trying to find a peaceful thought where you and I were strong, but in the absence of your love my happiness has gone. For all the times we’ve laughed, we’ve hugged and all the times we’ve kissed, for all the times we’ve made sweet love. Your touch is what I’ve missed I truly hope there comes a day when love will reunite. I’ll wipe away these lonely tears, I cry throughout the night.
Wait until she smiles, then she has accepted it. Now to the question what has she accepted, and how can you accept anything when you dont even know you are supposed to do that? Trust is the most important thing and if somebody said one thing and you trust that one, thats what you accept.
I wish the weather outside could be on my side today instead of shining with the most beautiful sun ever. Cold and grey would have been my colors for today if i could have decided. Now its just teasing me, trying to sleep after not sleeping at all this night, but the light even comes in when the eyes are closed. Headache is rising above all things, telling me to sleep. But all this pictures comes up as soon as I get closer to drifting away and I wake up again.
Love to me is like sand I hold it in my hands. And the wind blows it away before theres anything I can say. No matter how well I build it up it always seems to fall down. No matter what shape I make it always turns into a mistake so although I hold the sand I know it’ll slip out of my hand.
